Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Silly Names

I have never asked myself who I was
But sometimes I forget who I am
I enjoy playing a character from a Shakespearean play
Use my middle name and forget who I am
I walk into a supermarket, buy groceries I don't usually buy
And pay with money I don't have
If anyone asks me my name in public
I live falsely through my idols, pen names and reclaimed fame
Bars are particularly my favorite places to go
I can be whoever I want, whenever I want
One day, I may use my alter ego and play the silent type
Some women dig the silent bastards who had an abusive father
The next day, I walk into the same bar and play a tourist
I ask women of all shapes and sizes to tell me their likes of the city
As if I'm interested in such silly nonsense
I just want their number

Only one time, ever in my life, did I remember who I was
The day was like any other on campus
It was a beautiful day with many wonderful ladies
I usually ignore each one on my way to class
Since my focus was school and only school
However, one day, a woman caught my eye
She was in her second year
Working on her journalism degree
The only reason I knew this was because we shared a writing class
She thought she knew my real name
Hell, the whole class did
But it was a nickname given in my youth that the teacher called on
I approached her after class and she laughed
She knew my name in class was a fake
And she did not care what my real name was
We decided to go out on a date and ease into a relationship
It only took a few months for me to say I love you
But instead of her saying I love you using my real name
She used my nickname instead
I finally felt like my real name was lost
And I forgot who I was
I have never asked myself who I am
Until that day when the love of my life didn't know who I was

I'm not sure where this came from. I was listening to a Modest Mouse song called Make Everyone Happy/Mechanical Birds which really inspired me. Since a lot of things are going on in my life, I have questioned who I was many times. I'm still trying to figure out who I am.

I hope you enjoy!

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